in 
for Kindle 
And so we are already in the second week of another New Year. I’d like to suggest one simple two-pronged resolution for all my readers to
keep for the entire year…in order to prove to yourselves what a difference it
will make in your lives. One small resolution resulting in a very different quality of life.
Be grateful every day for five different things or
qualities in your life that have been there on this day.
Be grateful
every day for five different people that have been in your life on this day and
have somehow added to the quality of this day.
What would happen if furthermore you made the decision to be grateful for something, even the smallest little something such as the blue of the sky, or the abundant rain, or the sound of birdsong, every
single time a negative or worrisome or stressful thought or feeling entered
your mind or heart?
Can you imagine what a difference that would make? It
would mean that instead of spending a major portion of your thinking time on
things that bog you down, you would be spending it on things, or people, or
qualities you are grateful for. Don’t misunderstand me: I don’t mean to imply
that you should not spend time on solving your problems, but I do mean, that
that only requires a certain amount of finite time every day, week, or month,
depending on what the problem is. Once
that portion of time has been used to try to solve the problem to the best of
your ability, go elsewhere with your thoughts and feelings. (See also my
article: The Puritan Work Ethic, Wu-Wei, and Is Life Really Meant to be a Struggle?)
As this is quite difficult for many people, simply
because it is not a habit, and simply because so many of us believe that if we
don’t think about our problems all the time, we are not being serious about our
lives, what I am suggesting here is even more simple.
Rather than trying to figure out how to think of
something that makes you feel good when the worrisome or negative thoughts hit,
be grateful for something. This is
very easy to do, once you get the hang of it.
- Did the doorman smile as you stepped out of the building? Be grateful for that. Be grateful
for the smile and be grateful for the doorman’s presence in your life.
- Did you catch a glimpse of brilliant blue sky as you opened your
curtains this morning? Be grateful
for that.
- Did you enjoy the smell of your coffee perking as you were drying
yourself off after the shower? Be
grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy the hot steam of water all over your body as you
stood in the shower? Be grateful for
that.
- Did you enjoy the softness of your towel as you dried off? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy the immensity of your oversize bath towel as you
dried off? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy your pet’s happiness at seeing you up and about? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy the clean freshness of your mouth after brushing your
teeth? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy sinking your teeth into a freshly toasted bagel? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy your early morning jog around this familiar area
where you live? Be grateful for
that.
- Did you enjoy the brief and friendly exchange with the newspaper
vendor at the kiosk? Be grateful for
that. Be grateful for the exchange and be grateful for the vendor’s
presence in your life.
- Did you enjoy the crisp sound of snapping open a fresh newspaper to
read as you have your coffee at your neighbourhood café? Be grateful for that.
- Did you enjoy the sunshine in smile on the waiter’s face as he took
your order for coffee and a bagel? Be
grateful for that. Be grateful for the friendliness of the waiter and
be grateful for the waiter.
- Did you enjoy your partner’s touch on your skin in bed before you
got up? Be grateful for that. Be
grateful for the touch and be grateful for your partner.
- Did you just start worrying about paying the bills at the end of
the month? Be grateful for one of
the above items. It will help keep you in a better energetic frequency
in order to make better decisions about the bills
- Did you just get angry once again because the elevator still isn’t
fixed? Be grateful for one of the
above items. It will help keep you in a better energetic frequency, so
that the problem elevator doesn’t ruin the next 30 minutes or 3 hours of
your day by continuing to dwell on it.
- Did you just feel low as you woke up and looked out of the window and saw the grey skies? Be grateful for one of the above items. It will help keep you in a better energetic frequency, so that you will be able to start looking at your day more positively.
The second prong to this resolution is just as simple,
although just as unaccustomed, and thus will also require a bit of practice to
make it a habit. Remember, once it’s a
habit, you’ll do it without needing to remind yourself, and new habits can be
formed in as little as three weeks, if you keep reminding yourself to do the
new thing.
Send the intention of love from somewhere inside of
you to at least five different people every day that do something to annoy you,
make you impatient, anger you, etc. Instead of thinking (or speaking) the
invectives you normally would, ask yourself to intend love for that person. You
might say something like this in your mind: May
love fill your life. Or: Go in love.
(See also Your Attention to Bad Things)
That’s it. If you still need to speak to this person
about something, do so only after having gone through this nano-second exercise
in your mind. Your words will generally come out differently than they might
have if you had not done this first. (See also Feeling
Compassion: Only for the Hungry, or Also for People Who Hurt You?).
- Did someone get in line in front of you at the supermarket? Send them love. (You can still
speak up for your rights in a pleasant manner)
- Did someone cut you off in traffic, almost causing you to have an
accident? Send them love. (Why
waste time on getting angry about them?)
- Did your partner again forget to take out the garbage or wash the
car? Send him/her love. (Maybe
it’s a good time to revise who does what around the house based on each individual’s choices
rather than on what should be.)
- Did you daughter scream at you? Send
her love. (Yes, healthy boundaries and civilized manners must also be
established, but her scream is most probably fueled by an underlying cry
for help).
- Did your boss ask you to come in on Saturday? Send her love. (But also give some thought to the frequency of
Saturdays you are spending at the office, and consider having a talk about
it with your boss, based on your productivity, sales, efficiency,
know-how, etc. with a view to either increasing your salary, benefits, or
curtailing such extra hours)
- Did your neighbour criticize the state of your lawn? Send him love. (You don’t have to agree with him, just let him have his opinion, period.)
I hope you understood that the purpose for this is
first and foremost your own inner state of well-being and balance (see also The Absolutely Best Way of Giving to
Others). In other words, although you are sending something
positive to the other person, which will translate into an energetic
transmission that is beneficial to them, it is, in actual fact, destined to
make you feel better, rather than how
you would feel, if you gave in to your primordial instinct to snap at them, or
send them invectives from car to car, etc. (Before you pooh-pooh this, remember how much you can feel if you enter a
room full of hostile people, or happy people, or worried people…most of us are
able to feel what others are feeling in certain circumstances).
Furthermore, this is not about you being a wimp. It is
not about you not speaking up for
your rights. But it is about you being –
living – taking yourself into a higher energetic frequency simply by the way
you react to situations and by the two-pronged resolution you make, on this
very first day of the New Year (see also Having A Good Life):
1.
GRATITUDE
· Be grateful every day for five different things or
qualities in your life that have been there on this day.
·
Be grateful every day for five different people that have
been in your life on this day and have somehow added to the quality of this
day.
·
Find something to be grateful for (to move your thoughts or feelings toward) every time you feel a
negative emotion or have a negative thought.
2.
LOVE
·
Send the intention of love from somewhere inside of
you to at least five different people every day that do something to annoy you,
make you impatient, anger you, etc., no
matter who these people are, or what your relationship to them is.
Remember, the more you do this, especially during the
first 21 days, the more it will become a habit.
Once it’s a habit, you will want to have the benefits
of this process, and you will find it harder and harder not to do it, i.e., you
will eventually do it automatically.
You can choose to ignore this, ridicule this, or
decide that it is not for you, because it simply doesn’t apply to your life, or
you can choose to do this. This much
I can guarantee you: if you choose to do this, your life will alter
dramatically and for the better. The energy inside of you, and the energy you will
attract towards yourself will increase in your benefit. Such a decision also
forms part of your journey towards inner freedom.
***************
Also visit my book website: www.gabriellakortsch.com where you may download excerpts or read quotations from any of my books. My latest book Emotional Unavailability & Neediness: Two Sides of the Same Coin is available globally on Amazon in print & Kindle. You can also obtain it (or any of my other books) via Barnes & Noble.
Angefangen mit Rewiring the Soul - auf Deutsch: Deine Seele und Du, jetzt weltweit erhaltbar als Taschenbuch oder Kindle E-Book (Blog hier), werden auch meine anderen Bücher in Zukunft auf Deutsch bei Amazon erhaltbar sein.
Note: If you are wondering why this blog is now only appearing on alternate days (excluding Sat/Sun), it is because I also post on my other blog on the others days. That other blog is The Tao of Spiritual Partnership, so named for another one of my books. Click here to visit the blog and/or to sign up for the feed.
My blog posts are also featured on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google+, Pinterest & you can find me on Instagram
Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch (English). Available globally in paperback or Kindle e-book versions
Bücher von Dr. Gabriella Kortsch (Deutsch) ... JETZT bei Amazon (Taschenbuch oder E-Book) erhaltbar
DEINE SEELE UND DU
Libros por Gabriella Kortsch (español) ... próximamente en Amazon en versión bolsillo y E-Libro para Kindle
Empezando con Rewiring the Soul - en español: Reconectar con el Alma (blog aquí), se podrán encontrar mis libros en español por todo el mundo próximamente en Amazon.
My blog posts are also featured on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google+, Pinterest & you can find me on Instagram
No comments:
Post a Comment