That
is not a facetious answer. Rather, it is a choice. The more you are responsible
for yourself, your SELF, your words, thoughts, emotions, actions, and
reactions, the more you are able to consciously choose that which serves you -
and your world - best. Would that old man have shown greater love for his
deceased wife by grieving for months or even years? Or did he show immense love
by realizing he served the energy of the global community best by bringing his
energy back to a level where it did not detract from, but rather added to the
already existing energy on our planet?
What
happens when you see someone going through a hard time or suffering? You
feel bad for them, right? How does that help them? Feeling compassion for
another who is dealing with some difficult cards that life has dealt him or her
is worlds removed from making yourself feel bad so that somehow, some
way, the other gets better from your bad or sad feelings. If this were
truly so, we could all go take classes and learn how to feel really, really and
terribly bad so that the ills of the world would improve, right? As stated in
the example of the man who was dancing the night after his wife's death, the choices
we make about our feelings have the capacity to contribute or detract from the
overall energetic frequency of the world. That includes our feelings in
difficult situations. When you find yourself deciding to feel bad about
something difficult that is happening to another, remember that such a decision
detracts and reduces the overall energetic frequency of the world. You've heard
- by now - of the concept taken from the wisdom of most of the ancient
thinkers, writer, and teachers, as well as from quantum physics, that we are
all one. If you can even begin to accept the mere possibility of this being
so, then you will quickly understand that your personal energetic
frequency, and my personal energetic frequency, and that of all
the other beings in this world contribute towards our global energy. And we can
all understand that raising that global energy is most definitely an
undertaking worth striving for. Just think: would a gobal community whose
overall energy were much higher than it currently is even consider tolerating
things like war, hunger, child slavery, sexual exploitation, lack of water, or
no access to education? Therefore it stands to reason that you could choose
maintain your own personal energetic frequency in as good a place as
possible. And that includes what you choose to do with it when you see
suffering in others. In some ways, refraining from feeling bad in those
situations, is related to what the Buddhists call compassionate detachment. One
of the greatest things you can do to make the world a better place - and we
can all do this - is to choose to maintain your own energetic frequency
high. And that takes us to the concept of suffering being optional.
A
child falls and scrapes its knee. The fright and pain cause him to cry. Mother
comes running, hugs him, kisses the knee, and finds a cookie (and/or antiseptic
cream and a band-aid). Miraculously the crying and fright stop. Part of the
reason has to do with mother's safe and enveloping arms. Part of it is the
distraction of the coveted cookie. And part of it is (although with a small
child there is generally nothing 'conscious' about this) a choice that
is made to pay more attention to the good thing (mother's
arms, hug, kiss, cookie), than to the bad thing (falling and
scraping the knee).
Let this small and simple analogy serve to help you make good choices when you are suffering. You may not have anyone around to comfort you (think Nelson Mandela at Robben Island for 27 years), you may not be getting a cookie (think Victor Frankl in Auschwitz during the Holocaust), but you always have a choice about how you think about what is happening to you. And therein lies freedom. It was actually Frankl who realized during his own suffering and famously stated: Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.
And the Buddha said: Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.
Let this small and simple analogy serve to help you make good choices when you are suffering. You may not have anyone around to comfort you (think Nelson Mandela at Robben Island for 27 years), you may not be getting a cookie (think Victor Frankl in Auschwitz during the Holocaust), but you always have a choice about how you think about what is happening to you. And therein lies freedom. It was actually Frankl who realized during his own suffering and famously stated: Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.
And the Buddha said: Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.
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Also visit my book website: www.gabriellakortsch.com where you may download excerpts or read quotations from any of my books. My new book Emotional Unavailability & Neediness: Two Sides of the Same Coin is now out globally on Amazon in print & Kindle. You can also obtain it (or any of my other books) via Barnes & Noble.
Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch
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