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Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Three Keys for Creating a Lifelong Friend


A friend is so much more than just another person. A friend can be counted on through thick and thin. A friend doesn't care that you sometimes tell the same joke over and over, nor does a friend mind when you don't call for a while. Neither does a friend care if you've aged, or gained weight, or want to go - yet again - to that one restaurant where the beef carpaccio is so good,  E. Hubbard said a friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.

These friends you may be lucky enough to have, however, are out there, in the external world. Today I want to talk about the friendship with yourself, because you are possibly - and probably - the only one who will be with you from the moment you were born until the very second you cease to exist.

But chances are that you have never developed that friendship with yourself. After all, who ever told you about this, and that it might be one of the most important things you could do for lasting well-being. Probably your parents did not say that, definitely your schools did not teach that, more than likely your church did not suggest you do this either. And while mass media encouraged you to do and buy many things to adorn yourself and make yourself more important externally, I very much doubt they ever gave you any messages about creating a friendship with yourself.

So here are three keys you can implement in order to begin right now:
  1. Just as you love your friends out there in the external world, you need to create a loving relationship with yourself. This means caring for yourself, being kind and compassionate to yourself, and loving yourself. Also see Loving Yourself: A Roadmap 
  2. Be willing to 'be there'. Just as you are willing spend time with your friends, and be there with them, you also need to create time for yourself. This implies self-reflection, awareness, and mindfulness. Also see Consciousness is a Full-time Job .
  3. Be willing to 'get to know yourself'. Just as you gradually get to know a friend over time, not only because you spend time together, but also because you are interested in getting to know them. You want to know how they think, and what makes them tick. This implies developing interest in yourself, and observing all that makes you tick. More self-reflection. Have a look at Are You Doing it for Them or for You? 
Creating and developing this friendship with yourself is as important - if not much more - as doing so with people in the outside world. They may leave, change, move away, die, but you will always be there with you. The relationship you have with yourself makes all the difference in a life worth living.


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Also visit my book website: www.gabriellakortsch.com where you may download excerpts or read quotations from any of my books.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch


Note: If you are wondering why this blog is now only appearing on alternate days (excluding Sat/Sun), it is because I also post on my other blog on the others days. That other blog is The Tao of Spiritual Partnership, so named for another one of my books. Click here to visit the blog and/or to sign up for the feed.

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