A Happiness Index created from the answers rose in 40 countries between 1981 and 2007, and it fell in the other 12.
"A revelation of insight into the foundations of human suffering & transcendence. It not only lays out essential steps for inner freedom and joy but illuminates the way to true human potential." Paul Rademacher, author: A Spiritual Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe
"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world and practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd, author: Daring To Be Yourself
Monday, June 30, 2008
A Happiness Index created from the answers rose in 40 countries between 1981 and 2007, and it fell in the other 12.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
TED is a truly great website with a lot of free material to view and listen to ... remember what I am always saying to encourage you to keep your energy high. Click here for more posts on this blog about energy.
If you are unable to watch it, click here to go to the original website.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Little by little does the trick. (Aesop)
Do every act of your life as if it were your last. (Marcus Aurelius)
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. (Aristotle)
Work Hard to Succeed
Many of us were taught sayings such as these and others along similar lines from early childhood. We know we have to work hard in order to succeed. We know that the hardworking ant will be able to survive the winter, while the grasshopper will not (and might try to scam the ant in order to get some free “stuff”). We know we will sow what we reap, and in order to reap a good harvest, we have to put in a hard day’s work.
Or do we? Maybe we’re just looking at the whole thing through a pair of smudged glasses.
Puritan Work Ethic
The Puritan (or Protestant) work ethic is a work ethic that was based on the moral values of hard work. It meant that working hard entailed giving service to God. It implies, albeit by inference, that the harder one works, the more moral one is. Hence, having been raised to believe this, some people feel guilty if they are not working hard all the time. It is as though hard work were equated with being a good person, and furthermore, if one works hard enough, one will in all likelihood have a positive result not only in the moral arena, but also in the more mundane, worldly one.
This can play havoc with the manner in which people deal with their vacation or free time, as during such a period, theoretically, one is not working, And yet we’ve all seen people working on their laptops at the beach, or reading a heavy business tome or corporate financial statement on a pleasure cruise. Are they all workaholics, or simply people who feel guilty if they aren’t working most of the time?
This can also confuse your sense of self esteem and accomplishment, because evidently many people work very hard, and are very good people indeed, and yet they are nowhere near financial or professional success.
Thinking Out of the Box
Far be it from the purpose of this article to convince you to slack off and become successful by lounging in a hammock on a palm-studded beach as you sip a piña colada. My intention is not to separate you from your hard-working self. It is simply to help you think out of the box with regards to how you look at hard work. Perhaps hard work is not all it’s made out to be. Perhaps we need to focus on working less in order to make our hard work bring greater success. If that sounds like a conundrum, read on.
Wu-wei is a term from Taoist philosophy meaning “non-action” or “non-doing”. In Fritjof Capra’s Uncommon Wisdom: Conversations with Remarkable People, it is referred to as ”not working against the grain of things, of waiting for the right moment without forcing anything unduly.” Capra speaks of remaining alert and focused on one’s purpose in order to achieve success in one’s endeavour. You might say that wu-wei refers to working hard at going with the flow, or simply, at going with the flow.
An example from everyday life might apply to someone who is starting a business. Working hard in the Puritan work ethic sense would be to start early every morning and work until late every night, going down every possible road, and if pitfalls arose, to batter through them, to break down any impediment, and to keep on until every avenue were explored. Hardships would be endured, obstacles annihilated, no stone left unturned in order to find the way to make the business a success. Should, despite such hard work, success still be elusive, one might say “well it wasn’t for lack of trying”.
Going With the Flow
Here’s how the wu-wei alternative might play itself out: the same person is starting a new business. Working hard would not necessarily mean the long hours as much as long thinking and being alert to opportunities. Realizing that when one avenue gets blocked, rather than trying very hard to break up the blockage, it might be wiser to go down another, more readily flowing and open avenue, in order to find a potential benefit there. It might mean working hard at becoming aware of what was playing itself out around one, in order to flow with those particular circumstances and benefit from them, rather than going against the flow and having to work so hard to break down obstacles and barriers. Remaining aware of the focus; remaining aware of the intention, and being open to whatever may open up at any given moment seems to make much more sense than to blindly “plug on” simply because hard work reaps success. The next time you are out in the countryside, watch a leaf floating down a stream. What happens when it gets stuck in some rocks? It allows the current to left it off the rocks, away from the obstacles, and continue down where the water runs smoothly, where it can travel more easily, because it is going with the flow.
Is Life Really Meant to be a Struggle?
Stuart Wilde wrote an extraordinary little book in the 80’s called Life was Never Meant to be a Struggle. In it he extols the virtues of understanding that if most of your life you have been told, and then continue telling yourself that life is meant to be a struggle, you will most definitely end up believing that. So then, if something works easily for you, you won’t want to believe it’s for real…you will mistrust the ease with which you accomplished it, and hence, needing to feel that in order for you to accomplish something worthwhile, you have to work hard for it, you will sabotage your easily won victory. Why? So that your outer life conforms to your inner expectations or beliefs.
Sound familiar? Apply this to business, money, love and relationships, spirituality, health, keeping age at bay, body weight, and any other area of potential struggle you care to name.
So what does Wilde suggest?
Identify the causes of struggle in your life, and recognize that struggle is actually a programmed response. Struggle is akin, in many senses, to anguish about the area of life in which you are struggling. Whenever there is a programmed response – in this case struggle - it will take some time and practice to re-program yourself – in this case to a more flowing response. Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now) writes “Accept – then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life”. (See also my January 2006 Newsletter: Living in the Now: Use it to Enrich Your Life).
Going to a state of instant peace whenever you feel anxious, worried, angry, or afraid moves you from your body to your mind and emotions, and finally to your spirit. (See also my article Entering the Now Moment by Leaving Unawareness Behind). Similarly, Wilde says that in order to achieve freedom from struggle, you just need “the ability to place yourself in a non-confrontive mode” with all issues in your life, both internal and external to yourself. As you become more and more positive and balanced, struggle begins to give way to inner calm. “Inner calm allows you to pull more and more opportunities to yourself because energy seeks its own kind.” See also my March 2006 Newsletter: Intentional Focus: Your Happiness, Your Success, and the Law of Attraction). James Allen (As A Man Thinketh – click here to get free e-book) says “All that a man achieves and all that he fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts”.
Imagine dealing with life and all you do in it as though you were a child playing a game. Is there any reason it can’t be like that? Any reason it shouldn’t be like that? Imagine if your work; whatever it is you do in life were like an enjoyable game. That every day when you got up, you would be looking forward to playing this game again. And imagine furthermore, that this wonderful game were what gives – in part – meaning to your life! (See also my article Finding a Meaning For Your Life).
So it stands to reason that keeping your thoughts balanced, positive, and energetic will go a lot further towards bringing you that which your strive for, rather than arduous struggle. Achieving inner freedom by getting such a handle on your thoughts will go a long way towards achieving the outer freedom for which we all yearn.
Monday, June 23, 2008
It's a night of long pagan, historical and mystical traditions, a night that is currently celebrated with bonfires on the beaches ... bonfires in which wooden or paper maché dolls are burned for good luck ... bonfires that some people leap over in order to cleanse and purify themselves ... bonfires that others use to burn paper on which something from which they wish to become purified has been written ... a night that some walk into the sea in order to purify themselves that way ... a night during which something that no longer has a room in a person's life can be released in order to give start to the new.
Here is a brief video from this website that writes much about the southern part of Spain called Andalucia. In the video some of the typical festivities that take place can be viewed. If for some reason you can not play the video, click here to go directly to the website where it is located.
I enjoy this night every year. I enjoy the manner in which it unites me to beliefs from other epochs, I enjoy the pure joy of the people on the beaches celebrating this night with their entire families ... don't forget that the bonfires are not lit until midnight, and hence, even small children are there until well into the morning hours.
Normally much music is also being played to celebrate the occasion, typically flamenco music, sometimes special horses who are trained to move to the sound of flamenco music are also on the beach. Believe in all these things or not ... it is a special night that is embued with the flavor and mystery of other times. It is also a time for contemplation and reflection on what has been and what no longer is.
The Four False Mood Types
Each of the four mood engines in your brain, as represented above, needs a different amino acid fuel. The lower your access to amino fuel, the more False Mood symptoms you develop. The four emotion-generators in your brain are actually called neurotransmitters. Each one powers a different emotional zone in your brain and each has a distinctly different effect on your mood:
The Dark Cloud of Depression
If you’re high in serotonin – you’re positive, confident, flexible, and easy-going.If you’re sinking in serotonin – you’ll tend to become negative, obsessive, worried, irritable, and sleepless.
If you’re high in catecholamines – you’re energized, upbeat, and alert.If your catecholamines have crashed – you’ll sink into a flat apathetic funk.
Anxiety and Stress
If you’re high in GABA – you’re relaxed and stress-free.If there’s a gap in your GABA – you’ll be wired, stressed, and overwhelmed.
If you’re high in endorphins – you’re full of cozy feelings of comfort, pleasure, and euphoria.If you’re near the end of your endorphins – you’ll be crying during commercials and overly sensitive to hurt.
You can replenish any deficiency in your own neurotransmitters using the amino acids as described in The Mood Cure.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Read more posts on this blog about happiness here.
Now researchers at the University of Texas have come up with data indicating that it is also the family that is a great predictor of happiness. CBS News brings this story:
For Happiness, Seek Family, Not Fortune
Money might buy happiness for some, but for most people having strong family ties is a much bigger predictor of contentment than income, a new study show.
When researchers analyzed data tracking married people over a decade, they found that while income did contribute to happiness up to a point, the quality of family relationships was much more important.
The study is one of the first to examine the impact of economic and family changes over time. Read more.
Photo: Cape Verde
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Click here for previous posts about Bruce Lipton.
Friday, June 20, 2008
In this article he writes about the Kindle, a reading device available from Amazon for some time already, that allows you to store and read books via the device rather than actually buying the book.
The notion has always been anathema to me, but reading this article today, not only from the point of view of an avid purchaser of books, but also from the point of view of authors, I am no longer so certain.
What do you think?
Random thoughts about the Kindle
Might be of interest to investors, readers, writers, designers, marketers, etc. Or not...
Two months ago, I got a Kindle. It's a fascinating device, unlike almost any other launched by a significant tech company. Here's why:
1. It's for women and women are buying it. The bestseller list of Kindle titles is much less tech-heavy than Amazon's list was in the early days of the web. An Oprah book is #1. And the colors and feel of the machine don't feel like the current uber-geek tech dream device. barnacles
This is a fascinating strategy. It means that typical technology marketing and adoption strategies aren't in play, since most tech devices go after nerdy men. It means a slower start (since paying $400 for technology is a stretch unless it's your passion) but also possibly a much bigger finish.
2. I just got rid of 3,000 books in preparation for an office move. That's two decades worth of reference books. I realized that most of the books I bought I didn't use any more (thanks to wikipedia and google) and that buying books in anticipation of giving them to someone else was generous but not actually happening in practice. For the tiny slice of readers that account for a huge pile of book sales (300 books a year adds up), moving those purchases to the Kindle is smart for Amazon and smart for the reader. read more
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
History, Religion, Sex and Money
Historically, and particularly in the 1960’s, as society moved gradually from a patriarchal position to one that we might call slightly more egalitarian, divorce figures began to creep up as more and more women found themselves being able to get an education and have careers, or even just “jobs” outside of the home.
Along with patriarchy, organized religion suffered a blow as well, particularly in the western world, as growing numbers of people began rejecting the norms that had once held them safely within the confines of holy matrimony.
In addition, as the women’s movement gained momentum, biologically, and hence, sexually, women were further freed up from remaining with only one man with the advent of the pill during approximately the same timeframe. The double standard began declining in power, and with it, women took off on a run, intent on proving to the world that they could live as freely as men.
In the mid- to late 1970’s women also slowly began earning salaries that made it feasible for them to care for themselves and their children if need be without necessarily requiring the help of a male. (Before you send off indignant emails, please bear in mind that I am merely sketching in the broad outlines of a painting here…clearly, many women are still not in such a position, because salaries are still not balanced on the scale that lies between the genders, but for the purpose of this article, let us say that for some women it has become possible.)
Mass media played along as well in the two decades spanning the 70’s and 80’s, by showing us Sex and the City, rather than the home-spun down to earth sitcoms of the 50’s. In cinema Kramer vs. Kramer moved us to tears, quite removed from familiar, old standards such as High Society. Glossy magazines such as Cosmopolitan advised young women how to have orgasms in one night stands rather than how to organize a wedding reception, and books were published by the dozen with the central theme of women free from the constraints of a male-dominated society. And later, in the film When a Man Loves a Woman Meg Ryan and Andy Garcia showed us co-dependence, and the recent film Closer with Julia Roberts and Nathalie Portman made us look more closely at relationship triangles.
Finally, we were shown on a large scale that among prominent people, whether politicians, or celebrities from the world of cinema, art and high finance, women could marry and re-marry, or not marry at all and have children on their own, with one or several men, or even adopt children without the benefit of marriage.
Old Marriage – New Marriage
In a word: the old idea of marriage clearly no longer works, mainly because it no longer fits into the manner in which the world has changed and evolved, but no new ideas for marriage have emerged, at least, not any that show any real signs of working.
Gary Zukav (The Seat of the Soul), a proponent of spiritual psychology, suggests that one of the main reasons relationships, partnerships, and marriages are no longer working, is that although we try to put our new-found ideas into them, in the hopes that with these ideas, relationships will once again work, the minute we actually marry again, we fall back into our old patriarchal patterns in an almost undermining fashion, as though these patterns were inherent to the very institution of marriage. How many couples have not expressed the sentiment that their relationship was fine while they were living together, and only went down the hill when they decided to get married?
Zukav is not facetiously recommending that we do not marry, and hope that by just living together all will be well. Far from it. He is suggesting however, that the old institution of marriage is invested with some very profound patterns, and that in order to remove these patterns and put others in their place, we have to look to the very foundations of what we believe a marriage to be.
Partnership for the Purpose of Growth
Partnership for the purpose of survival in which the two parties do not necessarily see themselves as equals is a way of describing the old pattern. Partnership for the purpose of getting love and being happy is another way of describing the old pattern. The great mythologist Joseph Campbell (An Open Life) said that people think that relationships are about happiness. But they're not. They're about transformation. “It’s through the relationship that the development of each is taking place”. (The Hero’s Journey).
Gary Zukav suggests that the new pattern be partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth. What this really means is that you start realizing that what is important to the well-being of your relationship is exactly the same as what is needed for your own spiritual growth. Each partner holds the pieces that the other is missing. If you are angry, suspicious, or jealous, for example, then these feelings bring up something in your partner that needs to be healed, and it is precisely that which is being mirrored in you. So you begin to see the importance of your partner’s interaction with you for your development (and vice versa).
So spiritual growth does not mean going to church or praying (although you can certainly do that, if you wish), nor does it mean that the importance of physical togetherness and contact is minimized. Quite the contrary. It enhances it. (See my article Sexual Energy). Spiritual growth does mean, however, that the common denominator of the relationship becomes the idea that both partners are in the relationship to grow (and love, and trust, and enjoy, etc., but with a continuous eye towards growth).
Eckhard Tolle (The Power of Now) puts it in slightly different terms. He says that when a relationship is not working, what was not conscious in each of the partners is being brought out into the light. He essentially means that by knowing (being consciously aware of) what is when things are difficult, the relationship becomes your “spiritual” practice, and through your knowing, you begin to react differently (i.e., consciously), and therein lies growth.
From Conflict to Transformation
Nick Duffel and Helena Lovendal (Sex, Love and the Dangers of Intimacy) and Eva Pierrakos (The Pathwork of Self-Transformation) make similar suggestions. They refer to the somewhat esoteric concept of relationship as teacher, or spiritual path which eventually leads to a process of transformation for both people. This gives the relationship a sense of purpose that differs immeasurably from the patriarchal or organized religion model. Duffel and Lovendal believe that a couple comes apart (with conflict) for a very specific purpose, so that they can build up a strong charge for the alchemical coming together again, physically, psychologically, and on all levels, as the relationship grows.
Can you do this in one day? Of course not. First you have to be willing to even look at a relationship as something more than a way to have another person so you can be happy (see my article Committed Relationships..). Then you would need to have a conversation with your partner to see what they feel about some of the ideas expressed herein. Then you can get to work. You might start by reading some of these or similar books, attending some workshops, seeing a therapist, learning how to become aware, and learning that you always have choices (see my article: Making Choices: Taking Responsibility for Our Lives).
What if you are young, have never been married, and dislike what you’ve seen out there? Your parents, your friends’ parents, you see so many other people who are in unhappy marriages or divorced. You may find that the ideas expressed here give you new insights. Marriage isn’t just to be happy, have the house, 1.85 kids, and live together happily ever after. There is a so much farther reaching purpose. Clients who come to my private practice and tell me they are not in a relationship, but are considering one, because they have met someone, only get encouragement from me. Why? Because being in a relationship is the second quickest way to grow. Being in a committed relationship is the quickest way.
Inner Life in Constant Flux
If you are in a marriage that is floundering, you might want to consider the ideas pointed out in this article. Don’t forget that your inner life is continually in flux, including the way you think about relationships. People don’t mature once, and then remain that way the rest of their lives. Likewise, they do not get married or get into a committed relationship and then maintain it exactly the way it was the day of the wedding or the commitment. Therefore, there is no reason why you can’t evolve your ideas of partnerships and look in new directions within the parameters of your current relationship along with your partner. Imagine getting a new set of stronger contact lenses or glasses. Imagine how they help you see the world more sharply, more clearly. So too, can you get another perspective on the real purpose of your marriage by considering the material in this article. The deep intrinsic satisfaction and happiness that come from psychological, emotional, and spiritual growth have few parallels.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
New Scientist has this to say about the event:
"Following the publication last week of the best ever photos of the ovulation of a human egg, we now go, Fantastic Voyage-like, to the first video footage of the moment itself.
To record the sequence, Stephan Gordts and Ivo Brosens of the Leuven Institute for Fertility & Embryology in Belgium performed transvaginal laparoscopy, which involves making a small cut in the vaginal wall and observing the ovary with an endoscope.
"This allows us direct access to and observation of the tubo-ovarian structures without manipulation using forceps," says Gordts.
For the photos of ovulation, which only accidentally captured the critical moment, Jacques Donnez at the Catholic University of Louvain (UCL) in Brussels, Belgium, used gas to distend the organs for photography. However, Gordts and Brosens planned the procedure to coincide with ovulation and used saline solution to "float" the structures." Read more
If you experience and difficulty viewing the video, please click here to see it directly on YouTube
Monday, June 16, 2008
Dr. Vliet is a member of the International Menopause Society, the International Society of Gynecologic Endocrinology, American Society of Reproductive Medicine, the North American Menopause Society, and the American Medical Association. She is on the advisory board for The Alliance for Better Bone Health. Read her newsletter about this topic here.
Today I bring her to you again, due to her informative radio show about hormones and health.
The show is available via the Internet and there is no cost. Although it airs at a specific time, you can easily listen to archived shows.
Please, inform yourself!
Here are some of her latest topics (click on any of the live links below to go directly to the specific show, or, to download the MP3 file for any of the shows, to listen to at your leisure, click here):
- Painful Periods? You need to know about Endometriosis
- More About Thyroid Problems How To Get Properly Tested, Fine-Tuning Treatment, Myths About "Natural" Thyroid Hormones, Safe Ways To Add T3 Risks Of Excess Thyroid Medicines
- FEELING FAT AND SLUGGISH? COULD BE YOUR THYROID! Subtopics: HYPOTHYROIDISM, HYPERTHYROIDISM, HASHIMOTO’S and GRAVES THYROIDITIS, POSTPARTUM THYROID DISORDERS AND MORE THYROID CANCER RISKS
- INTEGRATED APPROACHES TO TREATMENT RESTORING HORMONE BALANCE AND VITALITY Subtopics: hormones, birth control pills, mood stabilizers, weight loss, approaches with insulin stabilizers, surgical options
Photo: Guipuzcoa, Basque Country, Spain
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Palm tree grown from 2,000-year-old date stone
An ancient seed that germinated after being recovered from the rubble of King Herod's pleasure palace has been dated as 2,000 years old, smashing the record for the oldest seed ever grown.
The seed was among three recovered during excavations at Masada, an imposing 2,044-year-old clifftop fortress on the edge of the Judean desert overlooking the Dead Sea.
Researchers planted the seed three years ago after treating it with hormone-laced fertilisers. To their surprise, it germinated and began to grow. The plant, dubbed the "Methuselah tree" after the oldest character in the Bible, now stands 1.5m tall.
Dates were such an important export from ancient Judea they were depicted on coins and came to symbolise the region. According to the historian Josephus, miles and miles of hand-cultivated date forests stretched from the Sea of Galilee to the Dead Sea. Read more
A team of researchers led by Sarah Sallon, director of the Louis Borick Natural Medicine Research Centre at Hadassah Hospital in Jerusalem wrote about this in the journal Science.
Listen to an interview with Sarah Sallon on the germination, genetics, and growth of this ancient date seed here. This interview goes to the medicinal use of historical plants, as in the case of dates for their anti-biotic and anti-cancer, etc. treatment properties.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
This is what the July 2008 schedule looks like:
July 2: Using Technology to spy on your kids: Is there a better way to monitor what they are doing?
July 9: Being Compassionately Detached
July 16: The Purpose of Relationships
July 23: Shoes & Perspective
July 30: What does forgiving have to do with healing?
Click here for radio show archives from 2004-2008 (not all are up, but you'll find more than 100 different radio shows!).
The show airs weekly on Wednesdays from 11 – 12 noon CEDT (Central European Daylight Time) which is 6 hours ahead of New York, one hour ahead of London, the same time as Paris or Berlin (except at the end of October and March, where there tends to be a week of confusion, as not all countries change to daylight saving and back, and those that do, don't always do so on the same day).
See below for equivalent times in other locations.
Ways To Listen
1) LIVE on your radio dial OCI FM 101.6 (Costa del Sol) or FM 94.6 (Costa Blanca)
2) LIVE on the web Onda Cero (Once there, click on “Internacional” on upper right)
3) Listen to over 100 archived audio files on my website
Equivalent Times in Other Locations: (Locally: CEDT: Central European Daylight Time)
or go to http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/converter.html to convert from your time zone (some of these times may not be correct at certain times of the year):
11 pm – 12 midnight: Honolulu (locally Tuesday evening)
5-6 am: New York City, Miami, Montreal, Toronto, Nassau, Santo Domingo, Barbados
6-7 am: Rio de Janeiro
9-10 am: Reykjavik, Casablanca
10-11 am: London, Lagos
11-12 noon: (LOCAL) Madrid, Rome, Berlin, Paris, Warsaw, Tripoli, Harare, Cape Town
12-1 pm: Bucharest, Riga, Istanbul, Cairo, Amman, Kuwait City, Addis Ababa, Nairobi
12:30-1:30 pm: Tehran
1-2 pm: Moscow, Dubai, Baghdad, Seychelles
2-3 pm: Islamabad
2:30-3:30 pm: New Delhi, Bangalore, Mumbai
4-5 pm: Hanoi, Bangkok
5-6 pm: Singapore, Hong Kong, Shanghai, Manila, Bali, Taipei, Perth
6-7 pm: Tokyo, Seoul
7-8 pm: Sydney
9-10 pm: Auckland, Fiji Islands
Good. Glad to hear that.
Addictions Go Down Many Strange Byways
How about work? Have you ever had your partner complain that you spend too much time there?
- How about shopping? Did you ever cringe when the credit card bills came in at the end of the month and you realized that once again you had spent far more money than you have?
- Now how about judging other people? You do that more than just a bit? Like quite often? So that’s an addiction. Judging other people is something we can get addicted to. If you try to stop you will notice that it is almost as hard to do as saying good-bye to your cigarettes.
- Then there’s criticizing others.
- And stereotyping others.
- And being a fitness buff way beyond just being healthy about your body.
- Making money is a good one. There’s an addiction that masks as something totally different … perhaps even being responsible …
- Socializing to the point of not wanting (or being able) to be alone.
- Being a news junkie.
- Remaining young … better said: wanting to remain young. So the addiction is going after whatever it is you believe will keep you young: creams, clothes, injections, surgery, retreats, sports, etc. None of these things by themselves are wrong, it’s the desperate and continued and addictive search to remain young that keeps you from your life. (see also these posts on my blog about this topic)
- Complaining? (You might like to listen to my radio show about the subject … note that this particular audio clip will be up about the second week of July 2008)
- Feeling blue … now how’s that for an addiction?
- Feeling like you are a victim.
- Not letting go of old wounds. (Check out Caroline Myss’ Woundology and my blog article about it Woundology).
- How about being addicted to another human being? Can’t be without them? Need their presence? Feel like something is terribly wrong when they are not totally happy with you? This generally means someone we think we are in love with, but it could also be a child or a friend or anyone…stalkers of celebrities are an extreme example of this type of addiction. (See also my July 2006 Newsletter: I Need You…I Need You Not)
- Blaming others. Uff … that’s one to write home about. You are allowed to get off scot free, as long as you have someone to blame. And as long as you do, you don’t really live your own life. (See also my November 2007 Newsletter: Grow in Richness: Stop the Blaming).
- Living at any time other than the now; always moving into the past or the future in your thoughts (See also my January 2006 Newsletter: Living in the Now: Use it To Enrich Your Life and my May 2008 Newsletter: Where Are You Now?)
- Addicted to hanging on to bad feelings
- Being addicted to gossiping.
- Social power. Being addicted to someone else’s social power. Being in the reflection of their sun. Rubbing shoulders with them, their social contacts, and the remainder of their entourage.
- Not forgiving. (See also these posts on my blog about this topic)
- Excusing others for their bad behavior. Not calling the shots when you should. Having unhealthy boundaries (see also my October 2007 newsletter: Finding it Hard to Love Yourself? Check Out Your Boundaries and my July 2007 Newsletter: Emotional Unavailability: An Introduction).
Not Me. No. Definitely Not Me!
No, no, you say to me. Those things you’ve been writing about in this article are not addictions. Now look here … if I judge or criticize another person, I have a good reason.
- Look at those racists in that African country.
- Or look at the lack of humanitarianism in the members of the regime of Myanmar after the cyclone hit.
- Or look at my boss … he is so unethical … he simply takes all the credit for work we’ve all done as a team
- And what about my daughter? She’s nuts … taking drugs and going out with those tattooed guys that wear earrings
- And speaking of earrings … what about those teenage girls that get a diamond inserted into their belly button?
- And don’t get me started on those women that let themselves go after they hit menopause
And the pastor at my church! He has such an ego. All he wants to do is hear himself speak, so his sermons are far too long, And so boring.
- So you can see I have very good reasons to judge others … I certainly don’t do any of that stuff!
Right. I’m sure you don’t. But you judge others for doing those things. And furthermore, you don’t seem to be able to stop doing so. All I’m trying to point out to you is that you have an addiction to judging other people.
Ok, you say, maybe you’re right. Since I have read what you wrote, I actually tried to stop judging or criticizing people – even if it was just in my mind, and I realized that it would be quite hard to do.
So what?? you ask.
Becoming What You Truly Can Be
As long as you are addicted – to anything – you will not be able to become what you truly can become. You will be a splintered personality, as Gary Zukav called it in The Seat of the Soul. And the reason is because as long as you have addictions – of any kind – you are using the addictions to live your life for you. You use them to cope. You use them to cover up any difficult feelings. You use them to soothe yourself. You use them, in other words, to live your life for you, because without them, you are not able to. See also Making Choices: Taking Responsibility For Our Lives from my February 2006 Newsletter)
There is some analogy here to Eckhart Tolle’s pain body, or Chris Griscom’s emotional body, insomuch as they speak of the pull, the attraction, the seductive lure of that part of our life that causes us pain, because we know that place so well.
Your Addictions Live Your Life for You
Your addictions live your life for you because they make choices for you.
Here are some examples:
- You send a letter or email via your assistant. Something is written incorrectly and you don’t catch it. It means a big loss to your bottom line. You rage at your assistant for his carelessness. By being addicted to blaming, your choice is to not take responsibility for your own part in the mess (the buck stops with you). Hence you have no insights about yourself and do nothing differently. And nothing changes.
- Your partner is not pleased with the fact that you have an opinion that does not coincide with hers. She gives you the silent treatment for a week. You suffer abjectly. The pain is horrendous. You don’t know what to do to make your partner be nice to you again. Finally you apologize, even though you know you did nothing wrong, and a while later, life is good again. By hanging on to your addiction to feeling bad, your choice is to not take responsibility for your own part in the mess (your unhealthy boundaries). Hence you have no insights about yourself and do nothing differently. And nothing changes.
- You wake up on the weekend you were planning to drive to the country for some down time. The weather has turned overnight and it’s raining and dark out. You phone a friend and begin to complain about the unfairness of life and you complain about the fact that on those rare occasions when you decide to take a few days for yourself, something always goes wrong. Then you complain about the fact that on top of everything else, your hot water heater broke down and you can’t have a hot shower. By hanging on to your addiction to complaining, your choice is to not take responsibility for your own part in the mess (your attitude). Hence you have no insights about yourself and do nothing differently. And nothing changes.
There is an excellent section on this whole topic of addictions by Caroline Myss on her CD set called Advanced Energy Anatomy.
How Can it Change?
This is not rocket science. If you’ve been following these articles I send out every month, you’ll know at least one or two of the steps: Become aware of your addiction/s. Make the choice to make different choices each time you become conscious of falling back into your addiction/s. In other words, you make the choice to become responsible for all of you. Becoming responsible for all of you literally means owning all of what you think, feel, say, and do. Owning it, means you deal with it as you think, feel, say, or do it, rather than using an addiction to deal with it.
Let me say that again: Owning it, means you deal with it as you think, feel, say, or do it, rather than using an addiction to deal with it.
By applying some will power to this process, you will become stronger and stronger in this department, and then you will do it automatically because the addiction will no longer be controlling your choices. And then you are on the road to self responsibility and above all, inner freedom
Friday, June 13, 2008
Jon describes the revolution in medicine that has occurred over the past 30 years that has integrated the mind back into the body and developed a remarkable range of practices for integrating one's experience, reducing stress, healing the body, coping more effectively with emotions such as anxiety, anger, and depression, and cultivating greater well-being and happiness.
His work has been instrumental in bringing Buddhist meditative practices, as he likes to say, "without the Buddhism", to full acceptance within the mainstream of medicine, psychology, and health care, and has shown them to be effective in people suffering from a wide range of medical conditions.
Watch this video (1h 15m) here of Jon Kabat-Zinn addressing this hugely important issue.
If you have any difficulty viewing the video, please click here in order to see it on YouTube.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time.
We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laughtoo little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up tootired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. Wetalk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait.
We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big menand small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that doeverything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom.
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
If you plant HONESTY, you will reap TRUST
Friday, June 6, 2008
In this video, Greg Mooers, a best-selling author and inspirational speaker, gives step-by-step instructions to finding your heart virtue and living your life passionately.
See also these related posts and articles:
- Following Your Dream
- Have You Recognized the Symbols in Your Life?
- When Love Walks Out the Door: Six Tips For Intelligent Survival
- Where Are You Now?
- What Do You Do When You Hit a Patch of Ice?
- Giving Birth To Yourself
- Are We Connected to Others?
- Review Your Life As If It Were Your Last Day
- Don't Let Anybody Take Your Dream From You!
- Wayne Dyer III: Your Life Meaning
- Learned Hopelessness & Your Health
- Book Review 8 - The 4 Hour Work Week
- Boomers Seeking Meaning
- Meaning and Retirement
- Animating Dormant Lives
- Making Happiness a Priority
Thursday, June 5, 2008
The Codex Alimentarius is a threat to the freedom of people to choose natural healing and alternative medicine and nutrition. Ratified by the World Health Organization, and going into Law in the United States in 2009, the threat to health freedom has never been greater. This is the first part of a series of talks by Dr. Rima Laibow MD, available on DVD from the Natural Solutions Foundation, an non-profit organization dedicated to educating people about how to stop Codex Alimentarius from taking away our right to freely choose nutritional health.
Quotes from this video:
“what we’re talking about is waking up one morning and being very surprised to find that high potency therapeutically effective clinically significant nutrients are now illegal in the way that heroin is illegal. Not available with a prescription…illegal.”"we have recombinant bovine growth hormone and now we can choose milk with it milk, without it butter with it; butter without it…not under Codex. Under Codex every dairy cow on the planet must be treated with Monsanto’s recombinant bovine growth hormone. Furthermore, under Codex, every animal used for food on the planet, whether it has fins feet or feathers, must be treated with subclinical antibiotics.”
“Codex requires…mandates that all food be irradiated. Unless it’s eaten locally and raw. All food including organic food of course. So is it organic afterwards? Well of course the organics standards incredibly are low. The organic standards allow a farmer to use veterinary drugs including growth hormones, antibiotics etc…on animals and then at his whim reclassify them as organic…”
This video is 40 minutes long.
If you experience any difficulty viewing this video, please click here to go to the original website
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
- your partner forgot your wedding anniversary
- your boss did not promote you
- you wanted to go to the beach and when you opened the curtains, you saw it was raining
- you expected to be able to find the car of your dreams for the budget you had stipulated, and then realized it would cost much more. So now you have to make do with a lesser car
- you thought the person you had dinner with the first time two nights ago would call you by today, and they have not done so
- you expected your son to help you with the garden this weekend and he went out with his friends instead
- you expected your best friend to help you set up your party, and it turns out she forgot!
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Monday, June 2, 2008
In the June edition a timely précis of a longer article taken from the Positivity Blog is offered:
"This month we link to a beautiful Top Ten Fundamentals for Changing the World derived from study of Gandhi. We list the ten principles here, but you can follow this link to a longer article with full explanation:
1. Change yourself.
2. You are in control.
3. Forgive and let it go.
4. Without action, you aren't going anywhere.
5. Take care of this moment
6. Everyone is human.
8. See the good in people and help them.
9. Be congruent, be authentic, and be your true self.
10. Continue to grow and evolve. "
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Now it really looks as though major pharma might win this battle. Please make yourself aware of what is going on and why. If we - the consumer - don't do something about it, we could lose our possibility of purchasing bio-identical hormones.
Critics say move would leave drug firms in charge of hormone replacement
By CLARE HOWARD
OF THE JOURNAL STAR
Posted May 31, 2008 @ 09:10 PM
The warning was in the form of an official letter to seven compounding pharmacists. Preckshot did not receive a letter, but the message clearly reached him and his entire industry.
Preckshot will be in Washington, D.C., this week visiting U.S. Rep. Ray LaHood and others, calling these letters a political move to squeeze compounders out of the market and leave hormone replacement entirely in the hands of major drug companies.
Dr. Jill Carnahan, one of a number of Peoria-area physicians prescribing bioidentical hormones, said she "absolutely" will continue to prescribe them.
"Certainly, politics is involved here. Since the Women's Health Initiative, more women and their doctors have been concerned about hormone replacement therapy," she said.
The FDA letters came after the pharmaceutical company Wyeth filed a petition with the agency asking that compounders be prevented from using estriol.
Wyeth spokesman Doug Petkus said his company filed a petition requesting the FDA restrict estriol because it is not an approved product.
"It's the craziest thing," said Jeff Robins, a registered pharmacist and compounder with Preckshot. "Wyeth has sold estriol in Europe for years and years and knows it is safe. This is all about market share."
Petkus said the company sold estriol in Germany for a short period of time.
Elmwood compounding pharmacist Cathy Windish estimates the number of central Illinois women potentially affected by this FDA position is in the thousands.
Windish believes the current move is in reaction to the growing demand by women and their physicians for bioidentical hormones.
"It's growing exponentially, everyday," she said.
Ursula Schulz, a Peoria woman who has used bioidentical hormones for years, said, "I think this situation is awful. This is about a woman's right to choose."
"The reality is, the majority of FDA funding comes from the manufacturers ... the people the FDA is supposed to be policing. That leaves the door open for a conflict of interest," Robins said. "What the FDA has done is not an official stance, but they've sent out letters of warning. It's basically a threat."